Nails

Nails, they are drilled in, hammered in, all designed to make a hole through, on wood they combine two or more, bringing together some intricate design, beautifying. However you forget the simple fact that I’m only human…..

Nails dig holes in me, they don’t beautify; they give me scars, ugly scars. They make me hide my face in public, shy off, they break me leaving me feeling bereft, unworthy, hollow. They make me bleed profusely, tearing into my flesh, taking me apart piece by piece. Turning the little beauty in me into something hideous.

So they see me and whisper, point fingers, call me names; funny thing is they haven’t even seen what’s behind the scarf entirely. They are still partly blind, though hearing them speak they’ve seen my life in HD, are aware of all cracks and chemises.

In detail they could describe the limp in my right limb, the layers on my skin, the words I like to stutter, my love handles and four wheels and how I can’t walk for five minutes without breaking a sweat. They could speak of my child disgracefully reason I had her while in high school or campus. About how ‘waliniendea kwa mganga’ coz I have epilepsy. About how messed up I am coz they heard I take ARVs.

Funny thing is they are right, I may have AIDS, I may be obese ,have a love a child, be epileptic, have a disfigured face……didn’t I know that already? Probably before the rumours got to them.

So as I hear every word in passing, see them run off and warn their kids not to be caught in my peripherals, the holes get deeper, the despair increases, the bruises grow within despite the ones formed without. The plastic surgeon is as true as unicorns, I fear death so suicide is a farfetched possibility, so I guess I need a support system one that would help me silence the voices in my head.

I need to amplify the few I love you’s , the few hugs from those brave enough, the laughter from those who laugh with me and not at me. Find my joy within, trust in Gods unconditional love and purpose, for by getting out of my bubble,then I could see that iron not only creates nails but jewels as well, diamond does not just create drills but is among the toughest materials, it glitters and screams value.

Therefore I put down my mask and walk with my head high, choosing to educate you on the reasons why I am this way for the sake of your beloved who may come to be, or be born this way, though I pray that as I chose to be brave so will you be in seeking to find out the reasons why.., before throwing stones, that you will be more compassionate and not make suicide a better option for some. Make a decision to be the nail that joins two together adding value and giving hope because we all need some. No one is perfect. Unless with a ton of love.

Why next year, why not this year….

“Remember those times when uliiba skari, imejaa kwa mdomo na ungeshout si mimi😁, at times even before you were asked, ama uekelee bro na siz😁…shouting ni yeye💁,… This is before you learned regardless of whose mistake it was, fimbo ingeangukia nyi wote😎”

Mwiko, slippers, pipes, whatever landed on you….

So it became a habit, kushuku yourself when you are being called especially in a certain katone that meant trouble and when it turned to be sth good you doubted it ……like you ain’t sure they got the right person😎… * *ama you just used to ile ya vita😁😁

Then rejecting yourself before they reject you, putting yourself down before they do it to you, got more to cutting them off before they do you, to stop trying coz the several falls you need to go through ni aibu tupu😁, and you know toxic africanism, you fall, mse better get up without acknowledging hio magoti red…. We rarely do band aids if at all💁. On another note chumvi na shuge works as fine pia❄️.

Though I think this is some environment we create amongst ourselves, where we don’t give enough room to get it on the 10th try but we’ll celebrate you if you do💁, where we won’t help you with the cross but at calvary we’ll weep and moan for you, as you breath your last. Where Judas is not a house guest but a house mate🖐️. So you get most kids trying to flee a place that was meant to be a refuge for them, a safe haven….coz it’s just not heaven🔆.

There’s simply too much noise*and this kind Michuki didn’t give guidelines on how to regulate* so if you must add to it, speak life🤰, love💚, and if your words won’t surpass the beauty of silence, kula jaw breaker pole pole tu…

So big up to that home away from home, be it a place, a person, an activity, a voice in your head, a hug… and to you who is kind, brave, and taking steps with, on behalf of other humans, especially kids,.. and to you who is doing it afraid most days, some days or every day regardless 😊 as @ Nyawira Gachugi says…Cheers🥂 and be blessed.

Ps.

Still figuring out the ans. to the title….why do it later and not now💁….

NB… Be happy & do it afraid, with love💚

Magazeti

Time was 3am. Early enough that everyone was peacefully asleep without committing a crime, but still late enough that magondi walicome 😁😎

So mum heard gate ikivunjwa akauliza dad what’s up, dad was like ni waizi. First things first mikono zikaenda juu kukemea pepo😊the African mothers way🔥 then Mlango ikavunjwa na zikainuliwa tena😅. Kama Kawa Mzee hutafutwa just in case ajifanye John Cena but in this case mum was like hayukoo amidst zile threats za tutawamaliza😁😁then next was wapi zile pesa amekuachia😅😅.

I believe every African home inakuanga na kacup ya coins, ama kamkebe hivi. 😂😂So who is mum. Confidently, akaichukua nyuma ya mwizi kando ya great wall😎aka gazeti, so mgondi akamnyanganya na pupa but kufeel macoins zinalia tu, aka angalia.. Mum was “ni hizi tu, sina kitu ingine” in the mean time the rest wanapita na vitu za hizo nyumba zingine. So the screams are like ” mi ata sinanga Mzee,” “mi sina kitu ni manguo tu”hakukua story ya gangster points coz the real gang ilizireclaim😎.

Then for a minute they left, landlord akakimbia kwa maponyi na wamama wakaanza kupiga nduru😅😅😅wakikimbia from one end ya plot to the next… Juu chini tu🏃‍♀️. Mistake was hawakua wamefunga gate😂😂so magondi wakarudi kuwanyamazisha.

And that was really funny coz apparently it was their show😂😊…so mnyamaze coz watawamaliza na hawataki kushikwa. “Na hata hamna vitu za maana ni “Magazeti tu” 😎😒”. The real gangster points came in when wakarudia TV ya landlord, it was new 📺💁‍♂️..,and the whole estate knew abt it😎, buutt they made bibi ya landlord disconnect and carry it nje kwa gari😪😏, so Landi kurudi chorus ya wamama imechange ni “wooi wamebeba bibi🎶”

So job ikakua ni kuchukua matorch na kumtafuta but she was already coming back na story yake😎. Then when wanaume waliskia maponyi wamecome wakaanza kutokelezea one by one from……. 😂😂😂, na story za mi ata nimeamshwa na manduru ni fimbo nilikua natafuta😅. Alafu unaskia watoi wakipiga vidole then wanashout “Uoongoo, daddy tulikua na wewe chini ya kitanda, nyuma ya kabat, 😅😅 nilikukanyaga uso.. hukumbuki” 😂😂😎

Awesomely, no one was hurt so yes its important to raise those hands Up first. And Magazeti zilibebwa😂, but tukajichocha ni room ya baraka imecreatiwa which was true 💁‍♂️, but then the confidence of hao magondi 😅😅😁if you have even half of that ulishafika, si ya wizi though😎, and the wisdom to Cheza chini like those men when needed is gold📀..

All in all be happy, live, love and be safe and remember to pray… 💚

McM..

A man to me is…… Well still figuring this out. But let’s go back😎, not to when they hunted nuuh but before mututho laws and alcoblows.

So a friend of mine is celebrating her baby daddy, for getting her through labour😅😅grueling times, apparently this is where you meet your wife’s hotness, literally you burn, get nailed*kugwarwa*, words aren’t babe ama boo, you become the devils advocate then. But the beauty comes in after you stick through it all coz honestly we all know about some who step kustep ama wanajump more than futi kumi.

In a nut shell, I’m celebrating men., responsible men, caring men, loving men who step up not just for their families but for other guys and hold their hands. Whose gangster points blow the curve by being kind and redefining what man they should be, and doing some tu little things that are bellittled or go unappreciated.

Cause honestly, you don’t have to, it’s a choice you make. To be more man than some of those you know in your hood or your families. Almost 4 out of 10 kids, not girls, grew up terrified of the midnight song from their dads mouths, or that unknown call which was at times better than vita za usiku.

Sad thing is, unknowingly this influenced the definition of being a man, a father, a husband. So some grow up not knowing any better but hoping for it. While others be like the men they’ve seen cause that’s all they know to be. “A man needs to be feared” “kama hakuskii twanga, ashike laini”. But don’t you also need love and respect more?

So if amidst the expectations from your society, gengetone bros, your girlfriends, you are lucky enough to find a definition of man that suits you and is True and Respected : Dear man you’ve won half the battle😎.

On a lighter note😂😂, Mr man, who introduced singing when drunk? 😁🤔, ukiongeza kudance 😅😅😅kwishaaa, free entertainment though sad and a bit scary for your kids….. So please go build your home before thirteee, thatee, thirty, whatever you consider your 11th hour😁, and feel free tu drop the bottle design Uhunye alisema🍶😅.

Ps. Me celebrating Man🔥.

2. For the good, the in between, but not the bad.

Take me back to…or not..

Fifty cents aka masumni💵

We had the silver ones…zile dotcom, na the brown ones., cash in most African homes was always tight and when it wasn’t you just don’t waste it.

But there’s this unspoken rule that if you collect it from somewhere at home then it’s yours… So I remember Kuna times ningebahatika nipate hapo kando ya meza, just push it a bit and it falls kwa grao… Then I collect it and ask kanaeza endea koo *sweetie*😎 na pesa nimeokota, Ka ni sumni ni Sawa kama ni Bob inadepend coz 5 Bob ilikua chumvi kubwa😅😅, so justification was nimeiokota😎na nimejisema so siezi enda kwa shetto… Bonus ni nipewe nikule koo😏.

As for the silver ones, you remember zikibanniwa then Bob za silver zikaletwa.. Well gangster points came when you took it to the shop, then flip it to uso ya kibaki, and if the shopkeeper doesn’t check you get something for Bob instead.. We were gangster like that. Well till before you were cained thoroughly for it and stopped😅😅….and I mean vita za mwiko, slippers whatever ulipigwa nayo😂😂

Well, this are my masumni shenanigans, literally…. Lets remember some of the masumni things in our lives that make us hold on, try again, try harder, smile, as we appreciate the growth process from sumni za Moi, za kibaki, za Mzee, to 40 Bob imeshikana😊😌….we making steps, crawling, walking, running, bado unamove…

Ps.

1.Share your shenanigans or ukorofis 😜

2.Reach out to your ukorofi partners and see how they’re doing…🤗🤠, and remember the good times and smile😁😀♥️